You can never be fully known. You are so dynamic that at any given moment you may have a realization that changes everything inside you shifts and no one else knows. I have had these shifts throughout my life. The people around me through no fault of their own were interacting with an outdated version of me. This is why many people refuse to think outside the box; the box that they have been programmed or chosen to trap themselves in. The castle that their mind lives in may actually be a prison. It is scary to open yourself up to the possibility that what you have known is wrong or is simply holding you back. We are raised with ideas as children that are reaffirmed as we grow. You simply find people to validate your preexisting ideas and refuse to interact with those that challenge you, or you take the hard road and go against your program and find something new. I go into this in the Are You Conscious Series (which I encourage you to read as it is the blog that took the most time to put together and I believe contains some really good ideas.)
We are entering into a time of great divide and societal polarization. Can you consider the idea that no group is or can be entirely right all the time. It is very simple to distort the meaning of words. If you present an idea to a person that conflicts with their goal or world view it can be twisted. As I grow older the more I see that wisdom is knowing when to refrain from speaking. You can tell people the truth of themselves but if they are not ready to hear it they will consciously or subconsciously reject it. It can be very frustrating to communicate when this is the case. Words are containers for meaning. It is too easy to get hung up on the container (word itself) instead of the meaning. In society we have all sorts of ways of speaking to say things without actually saying them.
I challenge you to open your mind up to the idea that you are wrong. To the idea that you have a neurological bias that does not allow you to see yourself for what and who you really are. I am in a relationship with a beautiful woman who I love. I am also a very difficult person to be in relationship with. I spend a lot of time thinking about words because as my relationship has progressed I have seen more and more that we are creating a new language together. I have my way of saying things with my meanings, and she has hers. We must often translate our words and make concessions in our preferred communication styles in order to relate to one another. I have found that many times the solution to a dispute is simply finding different words to say what I meant. Of course, tone and unspoken communication (like the look on my face) are also major contributors to being heard.
All around me I see the manipulations and logical fallacies that people use on each other. They come easy and in my own relationship I know it would be easier to use them than to do the work of translating. I must be willing to question my own thoughts. Why do I really say this or that? What does it mean to me? How is it received? I fear society will continue to dig deeper into a polarized state of interaction, where two conflicting ideologies can't overlap to create actual communication. The truth is the left needs the right and right needs the left. Order needs chaos and chaos needs order. The real question is always how much.
I fear that true communication will be lost and instead of listening to your ideological enemy you will simply mock them. The funny thing is that I see both sides behaving in similar ways. Relationships are hard. Find someone that disagrees with you and work on understanding why they think what they think.
Rob Alexander is on a journey to learn not just about health but everything else.
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