The Cost Of What You Want Is What You Have

That thing you want, that you think will make you better will only make you different. So now life is a game of boredom instead of acquisition.

It will cost you what you have. The you now will stop existing the second you get the thing you are chasing. A new (you + new thing) version of you will exist. This is why our addictions are so crippling. 
I have never heard an explanation for alcohol better than a liquid that only makes you more thirsty the more you drink it. 
The fun of life is in thew pursuit of the thing. Imagine for a second that you could know the future. The second the future is known it becomes the past. The punishment is built into the the thing. this is the real meaning of karma. Not so much cause and effect as those things are two words but karma is one word like the word tree is both/neither the roots and the branches but if you know that you can't have pleasure with out an equal amount of pain even if that pain is the new pain of not getting to have more of the new pleasure these pleasure pain ideas can't be avoided and in the same way that some drugs balance the spikes and crashes life seems to be empty once there is balance. Inkow this sounds cruel and I'm not being mercilous to pewople in pain. I have been sick and scared but I will say that, for me, the worst part of it was the idea that I wouldn't ever recover. If yI had known I'd be better than evcer at this age I could have just waited....of coarse it was the fear of things getting worse thyat motivated me to make them better. I mean better as different because I was bored with feeling sick. 

Ask yourself. Do I want what I want of do I like wanting want I want?

I recently wrote a quote from Allan Watts 
 Rob Alexander
January 6 at 8:23 PM · “Model your own universe and see what comes out of it. What you will eventually find is that you model this one.”
Alan Watts
It is easy to say what should be done when there is absolutely no chance it will be done. The only thing a knowledgeable person can do is watch and see what happens because pushing one way or the other is just like holding your breath. The longer you do it the more air you will take in when your done.
2019 - realize you couldn’t do it better you could only do it different. You could help one and hurt another instead of helping another and hurting one.
Consider the idea that every thing that exists down to the tiniest thing you can imagine is a complete unavoidable envitability of all that is and that your awareness of that idea whether you like it or not is just much s part of it all as everything else. If one thing wasn’t exactly how it is, poof the whole thing disappears. Of coarse it disappears into nothingness and then reappears as soon as nothingness gets board which happens relatively fast since there’s nothing to do.
Here we are again. We just left and came back and the only thing I’m between that thought and the last one is the nothing space that glues our something spaces together.