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Clark Kent

9/11/2018

 
​Many people make the mistake of only looking at the physical world and thinking that where ever they are or whoever they are at this moment is the truth about them. Where I am at this moment is my reality. But the truth and reality can be different things, they can also be the same. I'll explain. Clark Kent works for a newspaper, wears glasses and has a hard time with the ladies. This is his reality. But what others don't know is the truth about Clark. The truth is that he is an alien and can fly and shoot lasers out of his eyes. Now there was a time that Clark didn't know the truth about himself he got hints that he was different and as he experimented he discovered the truth. His belief moved from the idea that he was a normal guy to the belief that he was a super hero. He didn't change, he always had the ability but his belief changed and as his belief changed so did his reality. It soon lined up with the truth. He is superman. These superpowers are awesome but they also mean that he will never really fit in with all the people who don't have superpowers.
I have news for you, you have superpowers. Powers that can allow you true freedom. You won't be controlled by any substance, action or situation you can remove shame and fear from your life. You can do what you want when you want. In your current reality you are weak but that is not the truth. Start to believe in the truth and your reality will start to move toward it. The truth is that the things you think you can't give up are totally unnecessary. You can do what you want when you want, it is your wants that will start to change.
Many people make the mistake of fighting with their struggles. If you fight with something it becomes your target, you start to focus on it. Victory over struggle is letting go. Realizing the struggle is unnecessary. Balancing the parts of yourself so that the symptoms of struggle go away. Realizing this will help you see that you are only playing a part. A part that can change at any moment. It will change the instant that you realize it can. As soon as you realize you can change you already have.

*When I wrote this to myself I was really trying to convince myself that I didn't have to struggle with the things I was. I was pumping myself up like pep talk. Back then I was in a situation that was very tough for me and I wasn't happy. I knew that I didn't want to go back to the behaviors and thinking that had done so much damage to me but wasn't sure I would be able to become the person I wanted to be. The things I struggled with back then I don't think about much anymore as I have built my life around health. I'm also painfully aware that short term pleasures often lead to long term pain. I'd like to think now that I'm a little bit of a Clark Kent as no one in my life now really knows the dark places where I came from. Those places are more concepts than behaviors. When I look back at the depression, self pity, sadness and all the rest. I know I',m still teaching myself self respect and self discipline but I feel like I'm making the progress I hoped for back then.

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    Note

    I was an Alcoholic
    This blog contains many of the ideas that helped me to get sober and stay sober. 

    ​Everything in Italics is me now, commenting on the writing from 10 years ago. Everything not in Italics is the 8 year old writing. In some ways I am the same but in others very different that is what make it interesting.

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