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3 Kinds Of People

2/25/2019

 
 Three types of people
            There are three types of people when it comes to a specific addiction. Never used, social user and the addict. I say a specific addiction because a person may not be addicted to one thing but very addicted to another. One of my main goals so far has been to point out that everyone can get something from the removal of addictive thinking on some level. The vast majority of people today have some addictive struggle on some level. For example a person a drinking problem but that doesn't mean that they are not over weight and struggling with a food addiction. A person who has an addiction to anger may not have an addiction to caffeine.
            With that said I'll go back to the start. There are three types of people when it comes to a specific addiction, let use alcohol for example. The first kind of person has never drank. This person is not addicted and I call them doesn't use. Simple enough, the second person drinks socially and so I will refer to them as the social user. Finally, the third kind of person is an alcoholic and I will call them the addict.
            I know that there are places where the line between social user and addict are blurry, the addict loves this fact. In any case hear me out. A sober person is in the doesn't use category. The goal of the addict is to find a away to move from the addict category to the social user category. The addict will try with everything they have to prove to others and themselves that they already are just social users. Only when the addict gives up on becoming a social user and accepts that they must choose to either remain an addict or move to the doesn't use category do they become free.

I would say after thinking about this now that the primary difference between the social drinker and the addict is the relational and emotional aspects to the consumption. 
I, as an addict, very much think of alcohol the way I think about my ex wife, I miss the good times we had, I know she never really loved me and I know she is whispering "I'll never leave" to someone else. She was a liar and a cheat but I wanted to believe so bad.
When I meet another alcoholic is is like talking to someone who has dated an ex. Moderates do not have this relational emotional aspect a beer is a thing like a slice of pizza. For me alcohol was one of the great loves of my life. 
I look back on it as a better to have loved and lost than never to have loved at all type thing where I loved every drink I ever had and some times I would do anything to get one more kiss. As an alcoholic I know she is always there buty she hasn't changed.  

0 Comments

    Note

    If Starting Best to go back to the first post by date and read from there.

    ​Everything in Italics is me now, commenting on the writing from 8 years ago. Everything not in Italics is the 8 year old writing. In some ways I am the same but in others very different that is what make it interesting.
    Blog Intro Video
    Note for Context
    It takes about 10 years to master something. I drank

    heavily for 10 years and have now been sober for 10

    years. I was an alcoholic from age 18 to 28 after I quite

    drinking I found myself as the house parent at a

    residential treatment facility for teens with

    addictions issues. I started writing down lessons

    from my two years at the facility after I

    left along with thoughts and ideas from that time in

    my life. I haven't touched these writings for about 

    eight years and to be honest I forgot all about them. I

    have now been sober for ten years now and my life is

    very different. 37 is different than 29, divorced is

    different than married and California is different

    than Indiana. When I wrote these ideas I had no idea

    about the challenges I would face since I stopped

    working on them, the health, the jobs, the

    relationships, the finances and the changes in beliefs.

    I'd like to think these ideas from back then played a

    role in me landing on my feet stronger, smarter and

    ​happier. 


    GRAMMAR disclaimer
    ​These old writings  are not edited so don't pick apart

    the grammar. I'm a better talker than a writer. It will

    be fun to go back and post them in blog form. I have

    ​changed and learned so much since then.

    Author

    Rob Alexander 

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